Who am I? is the main question that a Jnana Yogi asks. When I got divorced a few years ago this was the question that took over my mind. I didn’t know if I was right side up or upside down; if I was coming or going, if I had a purpose in life and if I was emotionally going to survive.
My ideas of life as I knew them were all washed away with my failed marriage and I was suffering. This all stirred something in me that said “ ENOUGH!!!” I was tired and I wanted to find the way out. Since I had been practicing yoga for over 10 years, I figured that now was the time to use these tools that were so graciously gifted to me. And I did.
I chose not to approach it in the ‘regular’ way like practicing a lot of poses in a yoga class. Instead, I practiced jnana yoga. I asked myself, Who am I? What am I? How did I get here? How do I stop suffering? What is my purpose?
Each question led me to a deeper and deeper question. I didn’t know what the answer was until I threw caution to the wind and allowed myself to be fearless. Emotionally, I had already reached the bottom and simply felt that I had nothing to lose. I wanted to know what I had been holding onto for so long and discovered what it was… control. Control over things of which, in reality, I have no control over. I dove deep inside myself and found a lot of dark, ugly places commonly referred to as ‘inner demons’. They feel as though they are tangible and accessible. When, in fact, they are not. They are simply figments of our imagination. In truth, those dark, ugly places are not so bad once you are sitting right in front of them. With attention and dedication, you can make them smaller and smaller until they disappear.
Discovering all of these different aspects of myself allowed me to realize that I wanted to take these practices, thoughts and discussions ‘on the road’ and it is with gratitude that I invite you to “CHOOSE PEACE”.
